While I was wheeled to my new room after having said our goodbyes, I knew that our time with our favorite nurse Janice had come to an end. I was sad to say goodbye to her but made sure she knew how grateful we were of her and how amazing she is. I was settling in my new room with a new nurse hooked up to a bunch of different things and letting everything sink in. Everything seemed to be winding down so I told Brian to go grab something to eat. He, too, didn't have much of an appetite the day before and still hadn't eaten anything that day. So, he ran down to the cafeteria (I think with my sister and brother-in-law) and in comes our favorite nurse! She was back and she had an armful of goodies! She brought in a small pink box, some papers, and the most treasured thing I will ever own, a plaster of my daughters hand and feet. I cannot believe that they think to do stuff like this. I will forever hold these things dear to my heart. I remember telling people while I was still in the hospital not to pick it up. I felt like I had to protect that thing with my life. That plaster was irreplaceable. Along with the precious plaster, they brought me the dress that she wore, hat, booties, blanket, some locks of her hair, hand and footprints, and even some teeny tiny little rings they had placed on her fingers for pictures. I couldn't believe everything that they did for us. I will have these items forever as a reminder of my first born child. She is real. Sometimes I feel as if all of this didn't happen. It was such a short time in my life that I carried her, 8 short months. I prepared a whole room for her, I changed my entire lifestyle, and quit my job. As time moves on, it seems to play tricks on me. It feels as if all of this happened so long ago, even though it was just a little over two months. Sometimes it feels like just a bad dream. But, with these special pieces given to me by the hospital, my daughter is real. I can touch the molding of her hand and kiss the bottoms of her feet. I love showing the plaster of Lillian's feet and hand. It makes me feel proud to have such a great accomplishment. A perfect little girl. Her siblings will all know that they have an older sister in heaven and I love having these special items to remember her by.
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| Lillian's dress, hat, and blanket that she wore in pictures. Someone hand made these. |
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| The tiny rings that were on her fingers in pictures. |
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| Hand print and foot print |
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| My favorite treasure of all. The casting of her feet and hand. I love this. |
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